Planning one wedding is wacky enough, but two? Many couples do, for various reasons. With the globe shrinking every day (but as Steven Wright said, “I woudn’t want to paint it…) many couples find that their friends and relatives are just all over the place. Gathering them all together in one location, at one time, is often not an option. Wendy and Joe faced just that dilemma; they are thriving on the east coast, but Wendy has strong ties to the west, so a bi-coastal celebration was in order!
This cross country extravaganza started at the Manor, in West Orange; a classic and gracious venue that blends historic elements with cutting edge cuisine and over the top service. I have had the honor of officiating there several times in the past and many times in the future, and their attention to the details of every aspect of the ceremony and reception put everyone at ease.
We included this beautiful reading by the couple’s friend, Dana.
TO LOVE IS NOT TO POSSESS
To love is not to possess,
To own or imprison,
Nor to lose one’s self in another.
Love is to join and separate,
To walk alone and together,
To find a laughing freedom
That lonely isolation does not permit.
It is finally to be able
To be who we really are
No longer clinging in childish dependency
Nor docilely living separate lives in silence,
It is to be perfectly one’s self
And perfectly joined in permanent commitment
To another–and to one’s inner self.
Love only endures when it moves like waves,
Receding and returning gently or passionately,
Or moving lovingly like the tide
In the moon’s own predictable harmony,
Because finally, despite a child’s scars
Or an adult’s deepest wounds,
They are openly free to be
Who they really are–and always secretly were,
In the very core of their being
Where true and lasting love can alone abide.
After I pronounced them husband and wife, partners and chuckleheads, they shared a ceremonial glass of wine and exited to the classic recessional piece, “Personal Jesus”, by Deopeche Mode. And then a swell time was had by all! Including Joe and Wendy, who were almost instantly packing for a trip out to the west for reception number two! Thank yous twos twofers!