traditional-350wA recent post on a bride’s forum asked the question, “How can we convey romance at our wedding?”   I have a sense that she was thinking about answers like, “a lacy dress, beautiful invitations that send a sense of delicious anticipation, gorgeous, sparkly rings”.  That is not what came to mind for me.

I write weddings for a living, and I truly think that telling the couple’s story; how they met, how they got engaged, what they love about each other, their little quirks; this is what really conveys romance. Many or these stories remind us all that love is often a bumpy road, and even that conveys romance.

Sometimes, I’ll have the couple hold each other’s rings from the very beginning of the wedding ceremony, and ask them to let the rings take on all the emotion they feel in those moments. I ask them to take a minute before I start the vows and really think about not only that day, but the years ahead. I remind them that they won’t always see eye to eye, as they do that moment, but if they keep the upcoming promises in their hearts, they can overcome any odds. (You can find that reading right here; along with many others.)

That being said (shameless plug for interesting ceremonies, lol), one of my couples decided to whisper their vows to each other. They leaned very close together and said the words they had written to each other. (I also printed them on pretty paper and we put them by the escort cards so people could see them…) The photographer was right behind my shoulder as I stepped away, and the potential photos, from my viewpoint, was so beautiful in made me cry (truth be told, it’s making me cry now…..but I’m a big mush…..)

The first look? I can tell you from experience that even if the “First Look” is the second first look, when the bride (or other groom or other bride) comes down the aisle in front of friends and family, it’s always an amazing moments, even if they have taken photos before.

Romance is different for everyone, and expressing what it means to you, whether it’s walking down the aisle  to the theme from Star Wars or walking down the aisle together or inviting four people to go hiking on your favorite trail and witnessing your vows on a mountain top.   When it’s all over, you’re going to be just as married. You might as well do it your way.